Loneliness Abroad

Perhaps it is Sunday afternoon. You have been out, done the shopping and spoken to people. Then you get home and wish there were someone you could call over without having to make a plan.

You might miss the friend who knew when something was wrong before you said anything. Or having someone nearby who would happily do very little with you.

If that sounds familiar, what kind of company are you missing most? Give yourself a moment to answer honestly.

The NHS guidance on loneliness explains that loneliness can involve missing emotional closeness or a wider social circle. You can feel it even when other people are around.

Perhaps your new colleagues are lovely, but you do not yet feel comfortable telling them you have had a difficult week. That is a different need from wanting someone to explore the city with.

Try finishing this sentence: 'I wish I had someone here who I could…' Your answer can help you decide what to reach for next.

Think of someone you already trust. You could say: 'I have been missing having you nearby. Could we arrange a proper catch up this week?' You can share the good parts of your new life and the parts that feel hard in the same conversation.

If meeting a whole group feels like too much, start with something simpler. Mind suggests taking things slowly, including small conversations and returning to familiar places where you may begin to recognise people.

For your week, that could mean going back to a class you enjoyed or asking one person whether they fancy a coffee afterwards. Choose somewhere you actually want to be, so there is something in the experience for you even if friendship takes time.

If an invitation does not work out, notice what happened before deciding what it means about you. Someone being unavailable on Saturday is not enough information to conclude that you are unwanted.

Am I being ungrateful? You can appreciate living abroad and miss familiar company. Try describing the need without judging it: 'I would like more closeness in my week.'

Should I stop calling people back home? You do not need to cut yourself off to build a life here. Consider whether there is room for both familiar contact and opportunities nearby.

What if nothing seems to help? If loneliness is persistent or affecting your everyday life, speak with a healthcare professional or support service. Mind's guidance includes talking therapies as an option.

Choose one person and one manageable way to connect. You do not have to build your whole social life this week. Start with a conversation you would like to have.